I'm sorry. Two simple words and I'm wondering why it is that some people have such difficulty in saying them. How they can stubbornly refuse when they are so obviously wrong because of their pride and need to be right. How they can go years if need be and still refuse to see that their actions were so totally reprehensible and completely devoid of compassion.
And yet, despite it all, you still reach out to try and make amends because this person has been such an integral part of your life and your heart is willing to make things good between you again. In fact you naively believe that you have to set things right because how do you let go of someone you love? How do you accept that the only way they want you back is on their terms?
Unacceptable terms. And so they reject you over and over until you finally see that maybe goodbye is the only way.
I'm sorry that your need to be right and in control superseded all human emotion and that you alienated the ones who loved you best... but are still willing to have you back in their lives if only you knew how to let go.
I close both locks below the window.I close both blinds and turn away.
Sometimes solutions aren't so simple.
Sometimes goodbye's the only way.
And the sun will set for you,
The sun will set for you.
And the shadow of the day,
Will embrace the world in grey,
And the sun will set for you.
~ Linkin Park ~
17 people said...:
iam so there with you on this... to me,, it is so much easier being wrong... being right all the time is just way too much pressure.......
I so understand sweetie. There just isn't anything you can do with these folks. They just can't see the truth. I'm sorry this is happening to you. Big hug. :)
I'm sorry
That was easy enough! Yes, we sometimes try to hard to make things right that we either hurt ourselves or make it worse in the long run.
Letting go is never easy...unless you're in a boat and it capsizes...you grab the anchor rope and finally realize.... ;)
Paisley I just can't imagine the energy it must take...
Thanks Sandee. Just took me awhile to see it.
Steve... you just made me laugh out loud! :D
Dawn - I'm sorry you're going through a bad time. This post is full of pain and is very sad. If you can hold on to the love and let go of the hurt...wow....that's a tall order but an admirable goal. I think if you can do it, it will bring you peace. Difficult for both....but worth it in the long run. Work through the hurt and then the forgiveness will come.
Keep writing. Keep venting. It helps. And your friends will be here.
I wish you well. I wish you healing.
I've never been wrong, so I've never had to apologize. And if you believe that, I've got some beach front property in Wyoming you might be interested in.
Seriously, you have done a beautiful job of expressing the frustration of wanting to care for someone who acts in ways that make it hard to do that. The great thing is that doing that allows you to rise above and be the better person. And that is worth a lot.
I wish I was better at discerning when it was time to say "goodbye". Hang in there.
Mimi thank you so much. The forgiveness has come.. it's just hard saying goodbye.
Thanks Lee. It is frustrating but you have to deal right? Now about that beach front property in Wyoming...;)
Jillian - If I had been better at discerning when it was time to say goodbye I would have dealt with this a long time ago. There is no right time... it comes when it comes.
I'm sorry your feeling like this today. :( Your post was great. I totally understand where you are coming from. It is really hard to give so much to someone who isn't giving anything back. It's very draining. Feel better and keep writing. I find it always helps in these situations.
Dear Dawn,
Sweetie, am so sorry to hear you are going through this...
sweetie...here is something i learn from my life...."there is only one person you can completely make happy or satisfied that is you".
You have a beautiful soul and spirit don't let anything down you..
as Mimi told we always will be here for you...
Here is a ((big Hug)) for you Sweetie..
♥
bindi
Thank you Jessica. You're right it is very draining... and writing does help!
Bindi thank you for your kind words and great advice :)
{{{HUGS}}}
Yes, I know people like this. So frustrating...
I am currently contemplating cutting a few people out of my life as well.
sometimes you have to walk away.
Usually, what keeps us from saying sorry is pride.
The world will be a happier place if only we'll learn how to swallow it and utter with great humility, "I'm sorry."
Take care.:)
Yes Em.. it really is.
Meleah - yes you do.. and it sucks :(
Thanks Nina... I guess it's true that pride goeth before the fall!
I'm in the middle of writing a post on this very topic (Stupidity Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry). Unfortunately, in your case, it sounds like some one you actually cared for, and I'm sorry. Perhaps one day, that person will change for the better. In the meantime, all you can do is wish them the very best. I hope for your sake, and their's, that they realize the simplicity and the freedom those simple words can bring.
Thank you Keli. It is someone that I care about deeply... but accepting what I cannot change seems to be the only option at this point. I too hope that one day they realize the simplicity and the freedom those simple words can bring.
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